 [ WEISHAN ] July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 |
Monday, July 30, 2007 @ 7:13 AM I'll do whatever it takes To turn this around I know what's at stake I know that I've let you down And if you give me a chance Believe that I can change I'll keep us together Whatever it takes I'm 90% convinced i'm a weirdo. I went out of the house, took a train to vivo and back. All the while reading the physics tb. The other 10% will be when i start reading chinese storybks, like the one swee lent me but has always been under the desk ever since. Heheh. Gahh tomorrow's physics test and i'm totally screwed. 22 (?) topics and i've only READ 3. Guo jing is my artist of the week! I just keep playing her songs over and over again. Hahah. Sunday, July 29, 2007 @ 12:40 PM I've been pondering over it ever since the day i received the 'news'. I don't know how to set things right again, cos every one of my actions will be deemed as fake. Since i've already been labelled as the one who can only focus on one friend at a time, what a load of crap. I was hoping that letting things happen naturally would improve the situation, but the time this is happening did not permit. I haven't been talking to you. Even exchanging a 'hi' or seeing you around is rare. I wanted to, like give you a call or simply just IM, but you dont seem to care (given the amount of attention you get and the number of friends you have) and i was afraid that i'll get a stale response. There are so many rumours i want to clarify, especially those that you've heard from others around you. I'm a tad too late i know; you've already believed those assumptions that others have somehow twisted into facts. I dont know how, given my limited ability of persuasion, to change your mindset about the kind of person i am, cos i'm sure the image you have of me now is totally different from what was in the past. I just want to let you know, that regardless of whatever i have told others or what they have said to you, i am not one who will abandon friends just because i've 'found a better one'. This is the most atrocious thing one can ever say about me, and i was really hurt when i found out you thought that way. You're one of the bestest friends i've ever had in my four years in cedar. Three, for you. There are so many things you've done for me that i'm eternally grateful for. Too many to be named, but every single one of which i'll remember. Tell me, how am i gonna be your friend again? I'm willing to go to all lengths to save this friendship. Provided that you still want to be mine. I miss everything that we've done together, the names we call each other, just everything, every single second we've spent with the others (though those might not mean anything to you, but they matter alot to me). So much that i just want to run up and hug you whenever i see you, but i dont think that's allowed, so all i can do is turn away. I MISS YOU. ): @ 5:17 AM I just read the first chapter of new moon online, and its damn good! OMG i want to get new moon now! Sarah and i had ahemmmm some fun talking about a certain someone. Hahah. I wont use the word 'enemy', it bears too much abhorrence. Anyway we got cn's belated present after hours of walking around and around vivo (think about the dist we covered), and i took the left - while she took the right -. Hahah. We wanted to watch a movie (what happened to prelims?) but there were none that were interesting. Oh we saw Reese's selling at candy empire and bought a packet to try. They were nice but the peanut butter cups were too sweet! My sat-studying-partner is sick. GET WELL SOON, SWEESWEE! Thursday, July 26, 2007 @ 11:33 AM Update on physics spa file - i redid the whole thing in 1 day! (mrs yeo was like so pissed and i was hating myself so much) Oh, thanks alot to eugenia who lent me her prev experiments for reference and diwu who helped me with the plotting! (: I hope mrs yeo will accept it. I miss my old file with my own experiments! ): My hair is usually screwed but its much worse this time round! ARGH. I dont mind wearing a wig. I bet even the fake hair feels smoother and softer than mine. Lessons have been boring, long, draggy, bland and.. so on. Its all revision now. Sighs. I dont know when I'M gonna start on mine. Oooh i finished TWILIGHT in one day and its so awesomeeeee. I cant wait to read new moon and the following sequels! Gosh. Sarah's the craziest fan ever, she's like totally in love with the VAMPIRE. Hahah. I've been so full of self-doubt and self-hatred these days. Argh. I don't know what's wrong with me ; there's never a day when i love myself. On a random note, i think its time to change my blog song. (: Tuesday, July 24, 2007 @ 1:35 PM OH GOSH I'M SO DEAD SO DEAD SOOOOOOOO DEAD I searched high low fat thin for my physics spa file but i cant find it! Its not in sch nor is it at home! Boohoo! Sunday, July 22, 2007 @ 11:23 AM UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I shouldnt be here I shouldnt be here I shouldnt be here {SOMEONE GET ME TO STUDY PLS} MYGOD IM SO FREAKING DEAD Tuesday, July 17, 2007 @ 12:56 PM Ohmygod sarah is mad. All it did to get her aroused was to mention "Twilight" and now she's going all gaga over it now. Hahah. (: Anyway there are so many people reading it in school! Gosh, i really really wanna get my hands on that book soon! (i sound like a nerd) /postnote/ Oooh yay! Pageone with sarah on friday! :D :D :D For now, things may look alright on the outside. But one thing's for sure - the feelings are still there. @ 12:35 PM I'm tired of everything. Tired of being angry. Tired of feeling irked. Tired of being the one who spoils it all. ...And the list goes on. I shall not care anymore. It should not have been of my concern and business in the first place. I'm sorry for prying. I really am. On a random note, i'm seriously dead for prelims. ): Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 10:00 AM A few more hours later and it'll be monday! OH NO. Look at the pile of homework i have (and have not done): 1) Chung cheng amaths ppr 2) Stnicks emaths ppr 3) 2 history essays 4) that english essay thingy that i didnt know was already handed in (wasnt there that day) 5) Chi zuowen! 6) Physics SPA modification OMG. Gosh look at that. ): I dont care i shall finish my geog revision FIRST. (: I dont understand why the teachers are still piling homework on us when there's like only a few more weeks to prelims! ARGH. Right, out for dinner now! Sunday, July 15, 2007 @ 12:28 PM OMG i'm like SO DEAD. My phone bill exploded and my mum's really pissed with me. OOPSIE. And i had to pay her the "excess" amount so am like freaking broke now. ): If you want to sms, be prepared to not receive any reply! Hohos. Which means i'll be out of the telecomm world for quite some time! I think i've guarded myself so well mentally, that i cant feel a single tinge of human affection now. = Heartless? :\ Something in my mind just refuses to let me forgive. God, please help me. @ 11:04 AM Rosie came and went. Her nonsensical rattling was entertaining, but left me distracted. Hahah, nevermind rosie dont be sorry! (: All in all we didnt do much. Sorry rosie i was so boring that you were reduced to reading shopaholic! I'm feeling so very rosy now. (: I met jasmine ong at cp yesterday, and we exchanged stares and acknowledging smiles till i went up the next escalator. Seeing her brought me back to the old days, when true and "unpolluted" friendships still existed and besties shared all their secrets with each other. if things were still like this... In 2003, we set a date to meet at the swings on a day in 4/5 years later. Its sad everyone's forgotten about it now. I cant even remember the exact date. Is it true that friendships cannot be forever? I miss samantha chan and tiffany wong. Saturday, July 14, 2007 @ 2:59 PM Ooh i'm in love with canned black pepper tuna! Mum didnt buy me the usual 'chunks in water', but black pepper is really good! @ 2:45 PM Omg, i sweared today. It wasn't really considered swearing, but something like that luh. Yanyi was like "omg ws i didnt know you were so vulgar." AYE!!! I couldnt believe it myself too. Was too dessip and detsugsid. To the MAX. I've decided to abandon agriculture and do manufacturing instead. Its abit too late and risky to change focus, but i really suck at agri and memorizing 51 pages of it. Whereas manufacturing only consists of 17 pages? Isnt it like more sensible for a person who cant even remember birthdays to do the 17 pages one? I hope my decision wont kill me. (: Anyway Mary Tan Swee Leng has been so awesome and nice to me lately! Yay i love her! As a friend. She's always at your beck and call! Like "swee leng! go toilet!", "swee! go down to the canteen!", and she'll be like "OK YAY LET'S GO!" Hahaha ok i did exaggerate her enthusiasm, but she's that nice luh! (: SEE WHO SAYS I BULLY YOU?! :D Swee: Hahah NEH you 'tagged' what. (: I didnt say you're ugly, girl! Joy: Hohos, chem was so funny! I was really scared for you. Hahah, but it was really fun rushing like hell! Friday, July 13, 2007 @ 2:48 PM I deserve one big tight slap. What happened to my aim of 8points? 8 8 8. Words without actions wont give you what you want, weishan. (I'm doing alot of self-talk here) Oh fish, please go study. Shoo shoo. @ 1:42 PM I thought the wave was over, but how wrong was I. The tsunami came today. I've seen enough lies to know that there's been no truth in their words so far. 1 2 3 4. It ends at 4, for the time being. It came to my realization that sarcasm overrules me when i get pissed. I feel like swearing. No weishan, you shouldnt. Shut up. I love swee! She's so sweeT! (Oh no i hope her someone wont be jealous) I realized she sounded really niang over the phone. Hahah, that's good. If she wants to date she should do phone-dating. Boys will be mersmerized and it'll make things easier for her (not that she's ugly). HAHAH no i'm not in love with her. I'm a girl and am as a straight as a netball pole. (: Morningstones (stoning in the mornings) is too dao so i decided to adopt an address that's errrr more neutral? Hahah. (: 西界 is rather nice. (: 我心深处的阴暗面 只能眺望东边 你的世界太远 撑到想象的极限 幸福有多甜 可黑夜已吞噬我 就是拉不到你的手 ... 虽然和你面对面 却看不到我的脸 感觉到你不安的视线 ... 在长夜的边缘 给我一丝光线 让你 能多看我一眼 |